Living the DASH!

Counting down until graduation seemed like a fun idea...and I am sure come day 1 I will be super thrilled..but those days in between are what suck for us. Right?


MySpace Countdowns

No - actually those days are the crucial days that make the outcome reality. What I do with my time working on this project and what I do with my time spent with people will determine my character and my love for the people I am around.

I once heard the story about the tombstone and the birth date, death date and the DASH in the middle. Its the middle dash that makes the beginning and end significant. How challenging to view it that way, huh?

I've come to realize that God is only going to tell me the next step when I get to it. He does not usually allow me to "preview" what's to come. So I am just chillin' out, all the while trying to make the most of my "here and now" so that my DASH will mean something...so that when I walk across that stage it means something and when someone reads my eulogy I will have left a legacy of service.

Live your life today with confidence that your impact will be great. Tomorrow will have its on worries and needs.

What Do You Feed Yourselves?

So, I've been interested in finding new blogs to follow...I've also been talking to other people to find out who they follow and what they feed themselves. In other words, what are you reading or being influenced by? This is important to acknowledge so that you're not bringing corrupt mind and heart to the forefront for Jesus.

Some blogs I've found to be insightful...

Perry Noble

Lifechurch.tv

History in the Making

Church Tech Matters

If you know of more please share!

My How a Week Can Change Things...

Until last week when I got the chance to see my roommate and really spill my heart to her about some things going on with me emotional over my past, my present and my future...I began to be released of this pressure of having to be perfect and it helped just to be honest and real. I told her that I had not talked to Lynette in a while and I just really wanted that time so she went on to make it happen. I am so thankful to her for pushing me to do that, because she saw the desperate need for me to talk with my spiritual mentor. I got that opportunity to finally express some hurt and pain I have never dealt with. It was good afterward, but soooo painful to just say it to her face to face. I was fighting tears because I know that what decisions I make in dealing with these types of feelings, pains, scars, and such will be a reflection on my character when I am trying to minister to others. But the more I talk to others about how to reach people the more I realized I needed the same things to be reached and expressed love. (Below is my wonderful mentor and my niece Lauren)Then on Friday night I got the priviledge of some "down" time so I went to see the Lady Bucs play some Volleyball which they kicked butt! I just sat and was a fan this game, but following that I got some one-on-one time with my Fish. JP and I went to Moe's and then to see a movie. I needed this time because yet another person in my life who seeks to love me and express his concern for my well-being in all areas of my life. I am so thankful for him. (Below - JP modeling on the beach - haha - not bad to look at either, huh!??! haha!)

Once I found out I didn't have to go on the mission trip to Tennessee ... I jumped in the car and drove to Darlington for the night. I got to go to the Sweet Potato Festival for a while, see my Mom, Dad, Brother & Family, and dinner with Aunt Polly and Granny. I also got to spend some time with Granny doing things around her house and talking about life. She is my hero! I am starting to worry about her though because of her health and she is slowing down physically and mentally. As much as I dread Darlington some times -- this weekend was so needed and I loved every second of it. :) (Below: Travis eating some Oreos with his Aunt Tam!; Me and my two God children - Jacob, Tam, Joseph)
Yesterday, I returned to work and to the my Charleston family! I went to Jachin's 2 yr old Birthday party at Ci Ci's Pizza. It was good to be back in my somewhat normal state of mind and loving my family. (Below: Me and Jachin at his party!)

To feel so far from grace and love is not a good feeling at all, but its been incredible to see how God works all things for His good according to His purpose. I am definitely not fine or better or great, but I am on my way to healing from a lot of wounds. I still have a lot of anger, hurt, selfishness and pride in me. Keep praying for me.

For now -- I'm off...

Let's go LADY BUCS SOCCER vs. CCU and LADY BUCS VOLLEYBALL vs. High Point!

wordle?

thanks to my friend lauren -- i found this cool thing -- pointless but cool! :)

ways of this world

I just keep giving in to the ways of the world...

1. I have been looking into an iPhone and changing from Verizon to AT&T, but I have until August 2009.

2. But I did sign up for Twitter...what ever the heck that is. HAHA! Just another stalking method! Check it out (www.twitter.com) and add me!

So aside from that I am half way through the Fall semester which means only 60 days until graduation. That's right...December 13th... Mark it on the calendar! As DMX would say...Party "up in here...up in here!" I just took my mid-term which was on the WHOLE text book..what??? We're only half way through the semester, right? I made an 82 (C) on it and I took the Major Field Test which was extremely boringgg and three hours long. My focus is now left on this Business plan. If you have any insights to writing one of these let me know!

I am working on my personal website to get picture galleries up, but I am not sure I know how to accomplish this. But check out this cool thing...http://csusports.athleticsite.com/page.asp?articleID=2118. They put up these wallpapers I designed on the CSU sports website. They acknowledged my contribution and linked to my website. That's why I want to get my site more sophisticated.

so long for now...

CSU LADY BUCS

I've been taking lots of sports pics as you know...here is a new wallpaper i designed for my background. :) check it out...use it...let me know who you want on yours?
Or you can check out all of the ones I have done on the CSUSPORTS.com website.

Tam

happy birthday COACH!

(tam & tiff in Milwaukee @ kenny concert)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TIFFANY! Miss you friend!

(tam & tiff in charleston @ csu softball game)

Learning...

I believe I am just in that season where I am learning about many facets of life. I have been putting in a lot of hours at work and in the library studying. The good news is that I only have 74 days until I am walking across the stage AGAIN with my MASTERS DEGREE this time. It has been a long 2.5 years, but I know it will be worth it. I am just excited about getting back to a normal life of work and playing! :)

Here are just some areas that I have been a student lately...

1. My girls: I have for the longest time in my life felt incompetent to meet and mentor anyone. But for some unknown reason I have a group of girls who look to me for wise counsel, encouragement and fun! I enjoy them so much and I try to spend quality time with each one of them at some point in the week. For me and Clair -- we tend to see each other in the Library. For me and Amber -- well we do a Wednesday night dinner thing! I am very fortunate to have these people who come to me because they feel I have something to offer. So when I am feeling down and out like I don't have anything to give they show up and I find that fulfillment in my calling to be at CSU.

2. School:As of right now writing this post I only have about 74 more days until I walk across the stage. I believe I can do it! :) No - I KNOW I can do it! :) I did get my ring in the mail the other day. Its PURTY! As for my class - Its midterm week for us and I've been in the library studying like crazy. I think I'm gonna do just fine in this class, but its definitely been draining and time consuming. What have I learned so far? Well, I have learned that a business plan takes a lot of research and details. I love details so that doesn't intimidate me. Its the research crap that I don't like. I have also learned about how organizations can and should operate under a definitive selection of values. You have to develop/create---->implement---->evaluate! Most organizations get the developing and creating part down well. Some even get the steps defined on implementing that strategic plan, but many fail to actually follow through so that they can get to the evaluation part. They just jump back to creating before they know if the current process ever worked. I see a lot of this failure in CSU.

3. Photography: I think I might have finally figured out some settings on my camera to shoot better pictures in the Fieldhouse. I have been shooting a lot of volleyball pictures...so that is exciting. I am learning more about sports photography seeing that I have taken well over 1,000 pictures just in this past weekend (cross-country, football, volleyball and softball). I am also learning more about being competitive and style for my business plan!

4. Myself: I have a lot of issues! I might go into details about what I am learning some time soon. Right now - I just need your prayers!

5. God: He is so patient! He is sovereign and will get the glory no matter what! Elevate has been a complete turn around and I believe it because of those leading others closer to God and closer to each other (Elevate motto this year)!

Last thing for this post... Today is my little sponsor child's birthday! Jhonatan Omar Silva Murrafo. Please pray for him! He just turned 8 years old today!

Seeking help from the Maker!
Tam

Trip to Jax

Went to Jacksonville, FL on Labor Day weekend with Aunt Polly to see Rita (Mother-in-Law! :) )

Here are some pics of us...

Rita in her RED car...haha!

Me and Mother-in-Law!

Aunt Polly & Rita!....SHOPPING!

We had a chill weekend, but we cut it kinda short because of Hurricane Gustav going through New Orleans. She had her family retreat from NO to Jax so we left to give them more room. I'm going back down soon though...road trip anyone?

Kelsey's Baptism

What an exciting day for someone like me...who has been praying and investing time into someone. The impact made was reflected in the decision to make a bold statement of her faith and be baptized. She was baptized at Sullivan's Island, SC on Sunday, September 7th, 2008.

Here are some pictures...

The team surrounds Kelsey

Jon w/ Kelsey after the baptismNae, Kels, Coach G, Ali and Tina

Jon & Kelsey - Sept 7, 2008

Tam & Kels

and the video!


Tam

TEXAS

Well... I survived the summer sessions with three classes. I finished strong on July 29th with 1 A and 2 B's. I was satisfied with that...

I jumped on a plane to Dallas, TX the very next morning from presenting an hour long presentation and taking a final exam. It was so nice to walk through the airport knowing that I was about to enjoy a week of vacation.

I am going to put up some pics from my trip...

July - Sweet July!

Can you believe that it is already JULY!?! Oh my word!

I am sitting in my office looking over a list of things that need to be done just for this week and its pretty long, then I hesitate to even step back further and look at the assignments until we get to August 15th -- Freshman MOVE-IN! AHHHHH!

Time will pass quickly for me because not only am I working on getting Elevate, FCA and Orientation stuff planned, scheduled, and marketing ideas underway, but I am taking TWO classes still. I survived last month which was a rough ride, but God was good to me. :) So I am going to persevere through this summer. Plus, I have plenty to look forward to...July 4th weekend at home with my family, keeping Jachin for a weekend by myself, trip to the dentist, and then even more important...I'm going to TEXAS! Oh yea! And as if that trip alone isn't enough...its my BIRTHDAY and we're going to see John Mayer & Colbie Caillat in concert in Dallas, TX! I think I am willing to endure for that trip!

I guess the more solid foundation that I am standing on right now is that I am looking to the LORD for my source of strength and encouragement. Even in my doubts and incompetencies I have found that the Lord is looking out for me. Like I told you before I have been down a rocky road over the past eight months, but it has overall been interesting. :)

For all of you OTLs reading this...get your rest and idea caps on...We're going to have a tough week to tackle in August. For all of you others reading...please continue to pray for me and the things that are happening.

Summertime...

Taking it back to the good ole' days...And bringin' it to these good days! :)

Yes - I am addicted to NKOTB again just from their new song Summertime. You need to check them out because they are bringin' it back. haha! (www.nkotb.com) I know my summer co-workers are totally in love with them AGAIN! :)


Anyway, I am suffering through these summer classes and I am simply one day closer to have another degree and able to put a few more letters behind my name. I am so thankful for some of the people who are continuing to listen to me complain about reading more articles and writing more papers, and yet still loving me and telling me to hang in there! :) When I got halfway through the program I promised the Lord if He would get me through this program I would not sign up for anything else. (We'll see how well I keep that promise!)

I have been trying to cling to God's word and just worship him with all of my thoughts. I have been struggling these past couple of days to just remain pure in my thoughts and to not allow Satan to tempt me or convince me that I am not worthy to be a Child of God. And often times I allow thoughts to bring down my spirits...completely dictate who I am around and to people. Even though, many people can identify this in their own life, very few actually act upon it and make the necessary changes. I let thoughts like..."You're never going to have a lot of good/close friends because you are not cool enough," or "Tam, why don't you just give up and put your wall back up because they don't care about you!" These are the lies the Devil tries to throw at me. I have been battling these thoughts this week. I am thankful for my friend Kels who has been praying so fervently for me and sharing Scripture with me.

She sent me Romans 12:3, "For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you." Its funny because Jon has been preaching on Faith (what it is, what motivates that and what kills it). It has been really encouraging. I think one of the major thing that stuck out this past week while he was talking about Faith was just how PRIDE is a Faith killer! The Lord sent hardships into Paul's life to keep him HUMBLE. (2 Cor 12:7-10) Paul prayed that the Lord would remove those hardships which he did, but God just ended up sending more hardships in the place of those he removed. I like what John Piper said, "weaknesses are not sins, but experiences, situations and circumstances and wounds that are hard to bear and that we can't remove either because they are beyond our control or because love dictates that we not return evil with evil."

Anyway -- that is kind of where I am standing in life this week! I am praying for next year to be an exciting and stretching year for all of us. I know I want to continue to grow and build character and leadership...I don't want to be complacent. I challenge you to take the same adventure.

I must acknowledge that last post I left one person out of my "people I miss" list... and that would be Lee Farmer (my cheese! ;-))
"The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." - Zephaniah 3:17 (NIV)

Signing off...

The beauty of the Lord

So its pretty obvious that I am not very good at keeping a blog, but I do think about writing. I just don't do it. :-/

In the past month and a half, the Lord has been stretching me greatly in my walk with Him, but also in my friendships with other people who the Lord has caused me to cross paths with. I have this one girl who I was so blessed to meet this past school year and now I am mentoring her. Let me tell you... I never would have imagined the things I would have to pray through and face, but God is so good. I don't just say that flippantly, but with so much truth in my heart! On top of work, mentoring, and church stuff... I am still in summer classes. I am in two right now and will have a third one during July. AH!!! I am growing so weary, but I know that I am at the end of the tunnel and beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Praise GOD!

A lot of people are asking me....(some excited, some nervous, some sad, some don't really care...) where are you going when you're done? Just so everyone knows - I am staying at CSU until the Lord moves me on. I have verbally committed to work through May 2009. Only the Lord will be able to open the door for my next journey. Until then I am holding on to the rope and preparing myself for a ride. So for right now, no one should be concerned. Just keep me in your prayers as I seek the Lord's direction.

People I miss:
1. Kelsey
2. Alena
3. Molly


Prayer Requests:
1. My best friend and her husband, Kaye and Ben, are in South Africa this summer serving with Campus Outreach. They are leading a group of guys and girls there. Just pray for their safety, impact and financial support.

2. That I would continue to grow in my walk earnestly. I want to be see the Beauty of the Lord, but many times I hinder my own self. I know if I fall in love with Him then I will begin to see His good, pleasing and perfect will.

3. For my Master's courses to not stress me out. I am so close to be doing done. (december, baby!)

4. My time with my mentoree that I am pouring into right now. She is awesome! Please pray for her walk and for her to be receptive to the Holy Spirit, not so much to ME.

So, I missed posting anything last night because I totally crashed hard.

To fill you in yesterday we we went around and saw some of the island and went to the Sunset Bar. This place was super cool because you can sit there and eat GREAT food and then watch the planes as they come up and land. Its funny because we actually watched some Youtube videos showing people standing out there watching and getting BLOWN over trying to take pictures. We saw a lot of people out there watching and taking pictures, but I never got way out there. Below are some pics from there though...

Then we just drove around and ended up going to the shopping strip in Maho by Casino Royale. Man was this an experience...I had to parallel park first off. Then we went to this jewelry shop with Aunt Polly. Let me just tell you that "Bob Barker" worked hard for that sale yesterday. After an hour and a half of bartering with Aunt Polly she finally bought one dang pair of earrings. It was so much fun though just pushing this guy to come down on his pricing. (HAHA!) This is the guy and him working hard on Aunt Polly... and then me and him! I still don't know his name.

Finally, we came back to the condo to hang out and took showers. We went down to the restaurant down by the pool for dinner followed by a short trip to the Atlantis Casino right near the house. Can I just say I am not one for those slot machines, but I watched Mr. Chuck and Mr. David play at the Black Jack tables. Once we got back -- I crashed.

Today, I finally woke up around 9:30 a.m. Whew -- It was so nice to sleep for that long...and I didn't even have a headache this morning. (YAY, right Kels?) Then I went to lay out by the pool for about 2 hours. I even got in the HOT TUB. Then we headed out to explore the island. I let Ms. Betty drive today so I could take some pictures of the island scenery and we made it completely around the island in about 2.5/3 hours. Funny things to know about this island: 1. the roads are narrow and have lots of ruts; 2. the speed limit is in kilometers and so are the speed odometers; 3. you beep as a friendly gesture here OR use as a TURN SIGNAL; 4. If you ask for directions your answer you receive will go something like this..."go straight ahead and you will see a sign."

Anyway, some of the pit stops we made today were in Marigot where they have the market. This is where we found the coconut guy with the pina coladas. It was an interesting stop. Then, we continued on to Orient Beach...this is better known as the NUDE BEACH. I was not going to go out there on the beach just because my Granny would have been embarrassed to know I had been there. Mrs. Elaine stood with me up at the start of the beach while Aunt Polly and Ms. Betty walked down the beach a ways. I was simply admiring the sand sculpture of the LAST SUPPER that was done by a guy from Europe. While we were talking about it this NAKED man came walking up talking to us. LOL! Mrs. Elaine just kept talking to him and then Aunt Polly and Betty came back up. I thought Aunt Polly was going to have a stroke because I was standing there with this NAKED man. We didn't stay too long there and we continued on straight ahead looking for more signs. We ate at Carlo's by the Atlantis Casino. The waiter there was def. cute, but my luck he didn't have similar sexual preference. Once back to the condo (which we were not sure if we would make it) Aunt Polly and I walked down to the beach while the sun was going down. Below are some pics from today's adventures...
Tonight we went back to the jewelry store to see "Bob Barker" to pick up Aunt Polly's one pair of earrings. And we experienced another night in the Casino -- this time the Casino Royale (the better one?) It was alright, but nothing to brag about. Signing off for the day...enjoy!

Welcome and Welcome back!

So I woke up this morning at 6 a.m. (Yes! I know -- I don't ever see that time of day when I am home and not about to fly out of the country!) My aunt and two of her friends headed out of Darlington around 7:15 A.M. for Charlotte, NC to fly directly into St. Maarten's Island. So let me just say that these women have no shame and they talked about too many topics I never cared to know about. (haha!)

So we made it to the airport safe and in one piece and finally found a parking space. They decided to talk to every person possible between the car and getting through security. They even invited the US Airways check-in guy to fly down with us when he gets off on Thursday. LOL! Holy cow. I was not so embarrassed there...YET! With Aunt Polly squealing about every plane that took off we made our way to our own airplane.

That was a pretty long flight (3.5 hours) to St. Maarten's. I read most of the way down here so I am trying to be a more learned kid. I was hoping to have a window seat on the plane so I could take some pictures of the landing, but that was not the case so I just got to feel it. (ha!) On arrival, we got our baggage and then took a taxi back to the Sapphire Beach Club. We got situated at the condo and then decided to relax on the balcony for a few minutes.


Finally, we decided we were going to drive for a little bit and so we did…Yes, I am the Designated Driver for the trip. Holy CRAP! The people around here just beep their horns to let you know they are turning. There is no signage with the speed limit. And the roads have WAY to many craters! I’m going to know how to drive like an islander by the time I leave. It’s a different world around here. Everyone is just really chill and laid back. The stores are kind of sketch and out dated, but its been fun. Aunt Polly kept asking us to look for this place called, Uncle Harry’s.

Well, we found it – it was a unique place and we went in. The cheapest entrée was $19.75. Needless to say, this place did not measure up to our monetary value. We definitely drove past the airport about 6 times already and not real sure we meant to. Finally we found a 7-Alive. You read it right, not 7-eleven, but 7-Alive! It was super sketch.

We then came back to the condo and settled in for the evening…watching the end of American Idol. Now I am just sitting here writing this and I am zapped. I won’t be seeing midnight or later tonight. ☺ More to come tomorrow oh how I am sure of that…

St. Maarten's Island...Here I come...

Here I come is right... I am on my way to beautiful St. Maarten's island tomorrow. I am super stoked because I have never been out of the country but I am also going on like 3 years without a REAL vacation break from work. I hope to load some pics on here so you guys can keep up with the great things I get to see.. yes I am rubbing it in!

I look forward to sharing my heart and experiences with you.

Getting Back to the matters...

Yes - -I am going to get back into it...

Summer goals:

1. Spend more time prayer walking CSU campus
2. Spend certain amount of time on studying a week
3. Workout 3-4 times a week

I hope to express some of the thoughts and challenges on here for people to read and learn....about me and the LORD!.

happy summer people!
tam